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I don't like restaurants! Don't hate please, hahahahaha. It's a health precaution. I have multiple food allergies/sensitivities. I feel embarrassed about having to explain my life story while I am trying to order simple food, just something like a piece of pie or a bowl of soup. I don't trust places. I learned hard, assume first. I do like trying new coffee cafe' though and spending a few hours admiring their design and chatting with other customers.
I also extensively don't like to eat. Again, health problems. I only choose the very best food though, indeed! 70% of it has to do with nuts! (maybe fruit and nuts) I am nuts over nuts, f*ck yeah. But, I forget to eat a lot or I don't care. I have more to worry about.

I've got a stupid question. Do you think its better to own or rent a home? Opinions?

I think its rather nice to PWN A HOME!!

You need some cream for that burn, loll?

What's the number for 9-1-1 ?

1-888-555-H-R-O-N-Y


Do you ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Trust me.

WHAT?

Who?
Why?

You've been molested by Monkeys? What?! You've been thrown by the wayside in favor of the puppy? What?! If you don't think of something better to say I'm gonna make you get into this ring so I can bring out a can of Whoop--ass!?! And that's the Bottom Line...cause Stone Cold said so!!


Why is Wrestling fake??

It's scripted, but you should shoot yourself and that will be real.

Why are boogers green?

Boogers are green because they are a form of vegetable that is produced in the mucous membranes.

How many words can a parrot learn?

However many words have four letters, begin with 'F', end with 'K', and have 'U' and 'C' in between them, in that order.

What is up with Hungarians?

They are hungry librarians!

Why is Chipotle so delicious?

Because they put LSD in the secret sauce.

Who shot the sherrif?

The deputy.

Where is the love?

I don't know. Where did you last see it?

How did you get my phone number?